Angelica X has laser-beam focus. Her goal and resolve is unshakeable. She will allow nothing to deter her from helping women and Black people heal. While growing up in Dayton, OH, the 28-year-old endured abuse in her teenage years, heartbreak, threats against her life, disrespect and racism from doctors, and more. But she isn’t one to disregard her painful experiences. Instead, she packed them all up, carried them on her back, and learned how to make the burden lighter and lighter with the Teachings of the Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad. Today, she’s paying it forward.
She’s a personal coach committed to walking her clients through diminishing their own traumas so that they may experience the life and happiness they deserve. Through her platform “Healing With Angelica” she interviews people about how they overcame physical, mental and emotional difficulties, all in an effort to show that if she and others can heal, you can do it too.
Meet the woman who isn’t letting her trauma hold her back. Meet the woman who is dead-set on helping people lighten their load. Meet the woman who wants to help you see who God is.
Meet Angelica X.
[Note: this interview has been shortened and edited for clarity.]
JT: How and when did you become a member of the Nation of Islam? What drew you to the Teachings of The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad?
Angelica X: I accepted my own October 2, 2022. However, I was introduced to the Teachings back in 2019. I started studying a little bit more, I want to say starting in 2020. The information that I received, just learning it, it was just so amazing and how helpful it was with my journey and the things that I was going through.
I was fascinated with the Teachings because even before 2019, I went to a friend’s house and his mother was a Muslim and they were listening to Saviours’ Day at the time. So that was my first time ever seeing the Minister. At the time though, I was not mentally there to understand what he was saying or what was going on. So I completely just ignored it. But it was introduced to me again in 2019 when I met a friend who was actually a Muslim.
Honestly, just with the journey I had experienced in 2020…it was a very hard year for me. I got pregnant with my beloved son, our baby, our rainbow baby Amir, but during that time in 2020 I was going through a lot. There were times when I thought I wasn’t going to make it. I did not have the support and during that pregnancy I was going through intense anxiety and stress, only because back in 2016, I had lost a child. I never healed from that situation so when I got pregnant in 2020, I noticed that wow I did not heal from that. So it brought a lot of tremendous stress and anxiety. During that pregnancy, a lot of health problems had occurred, and at one point, I was just reading “Message to the Blackman.” “Message to the Blackman” is the book that got me together. And I was reading that book while I was pregnant. And it was a time while I was pregnant where I could not sleep. I was scared to go to sleep because I thought I was going to die. But one night I just told myself like you know what? Because I was so tired of being tired. I’m pregnant. I’m tired, but I’m scared to go to sleep because I thought I wasn’t going to wake up due to the health issues I was going through at the time. But that night, I just gave it to Allah. I prayed to Allah. I’m like you know what, hey, if I die Allah, you know, just take care of me and you know, I was just over it. After I asked Allah that night and I prayed, it was like every night since then I was able to go to sleep. And I cried about it because I’m like, oh my gosh, wow, Allah is so powerful.
On top of all the experiences that I went through with the doctors and how they were treating me while I was pregnant, it really nudged me to just accept my own. The lack of care [from doctors] may have, and unfortunately we don’t have actual proof but in my heart, I truly believe that the lack of care from the doctors was the issue or was the reason as to why my son passed away.
In 2021, I ended up dealing with a thyroid issue after having my son. While dealing with that issue, I went through a time of deep depression and anxiety. I had heart palpitations, my weight was dropping… It was just a really bad time for me. I was so, so dedicated to healing my thyroid because the doctors were trying to put me on medicine and I said no… I had so much fear, anxiety, scarcity, because [of what happened before] I was like these doctors don’t care. They might do this again. And then it showed itself just with the little things that I was going through in my pregnancy. I felt like I wasn’t being heard. So that was the anger built up in me, especially after that I had my thyroid issue. I was thinking, I’m not dealing with these doctors! They just want to put me on drugs. So I was really dedicated to healing myself… So I went on this journey, I connected with my beloved doctor and I just went in and I just went hard. I studied “How to Eat to Live.” I was nursing so I wasn’t able to do one meal a day, but I did only do two meals a day. I got the raw milk, I started eating the bean soup, I started managing my stress with meditation, with going on nature walks. I saw a complete change and during the month of Ramadan 2021 I got my thyroid results back and my thyroid was back to normal. So I cried tears of joy. So after that time, I was dedicated. Like, if I can heal and do this, I know everybody else can. I know we can do this, right? So that ended up pushing me into the journey of wanting to speak and wanting to talk about it.
Prior to that, but I hadn’t noticed it, Allah put it in my face in 2016, after I lost my first child. I’ve seen the Minister speak at Saviours’ Day. And then during that experience of losing my son, He had wanted me to share and talk. So at that time, I was doing a lot of Facebook Lives, just talking and speaking but I had stopped that. But now and in 2021, with the things that I had went through, it got me the courage to want to speak and talk and just express and also allow other people to share their healing journey. So that’s where Healing With Angelica came from.
JT: Do you believe that your desire to share other people’s stories about their healing journeys has connected you to your life’s purpose, and that you’re fulfilling the purpose that Allah (God) gave to you?
Angelica X: Wow. Yes, I do. I prayed to Allah because even as I’m still growing and learning new things, I think sometimes I kind of question my purpose. I asked Allah like, Allah, what do You want me to do? Am I doing what I’m supposed to be doing? Then, I had a dream that I was teaching women how to heal from heartbreak, how to heal from their diets and stuff like that. And I woke up like, oh my God, this is what I want to do.
As a young teenager growing up, I went through a lot dealing with society and men. Kind of going back to the first question, what really stands out for me with the Teachings… because I believe that everyone finds their own little thing that they just love about the Teachings, right? So when I think about the Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad and the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan, I truly just love how [they] talk about the value of the woman. Oh my gosh. Like that just hit home for me and that’s what I feel like I need to be doing is to help our women see their purpose and see their value in all aspects of their life, in health and wellness and relationships. So yes, I feel like I’ve found my purpose and my calling because I’m like, there’s no way that I would do all of this in my life, and not be able to share this and help people in their journey. I feel like I have to help our women understand who they are, but also, who God is. That’s the big thing. You don’t know who you are because you don’t know who God is.
JT: Were there any particular childhood events that you feel like prepared you for the work you’re doing today?
Angelica X: I’ll be completely honest. [As a teenager], I got myself in a relationship with an older guy. Very, very abusive. I found myself in abusive relationships from the time I was 14-years-old until the time I was 24. During that time period in my life, I was hurt, I was abused and I didn’t know what love was. In my mind I thought that that’s what I was doing. I thought, whatever a guy wanted, I was giving. I know now that’s not what love is. Honestly, I’ve been abused, I’ve been shot at, a gun in my mouth, all types of things I’ve been through traumatically. So when I think about it now and my purpose, and I see stories of women, when I see women in the media, I’m like no, no… You need to love yourself. You need to know who you are. So that’s why when I think about these Teachings, I found myself through These teachings; I found love. I would never in my life put myself through that ever again. And the reason why I feel like I did that, of course because I was young, and I can’t blame my mom or dad because they only are going off of what they’ve been narrated or projected. As I got older, I understood that at the end of the day, we as women, we don’t know what love is. And that’s a big, big problem. And that’s the reason why we put ourselves in these situations. And what I had also found out is that I did not have an actual father figure in my life. So that played a huge role in a lot of things that I had gone through in my childhood. I definitely feel like I’m in the realm of my purpose when it comes to women. Like I just really want to just bring them up as much as I can with my stories.
JT: How can people atone with themselves and make peace with their past?
Angelica X: I had to come to a point of accepting things for what they are. I truly believe it was Allah that actually guided me to that understanding because listening to the Teachings and reading the Holy Qur’an and listening to the Minister, at the end of the day, we plan and Allah (God) plans and He’s the best of planners. So when we think about things that have happened in our lives, or things that we go through, no matter if it’s good or bad… It takes me to a scripture in the Bible, “all things work together for good to them that love God” [Romans 8:28]. Why fuss and fight over something that at the end of the day, even if it was good or bad Allah permitted it? When people get to know who God is and understand how He works and how He operates, when you go through certain things in your life or when you’re trying to get over the past or when you’re trying to move on, you’ve got to understand that Allah has already rolled out the path for you.
JT: What are some of the most common issues you have found people deal with, and what are the solutions to those issues?
Angelica: I mainly work with women, of course. Most of the time, I hear it and honestly, it’s been a lot of women with children. I’m a single mom, and I’ve been talking to women that are single moms as well, unfortunately. … That takes me back to just the reason why you need to know who you are. You need to get to know yourself. I had one mom. She was just speaking to me just about her having a baby and her wanting to do this and wanting to do that, and she’s juggling this and juggling that. I told her that what I’ve seen and what I noticed is that once you come into motherhood, you’re a totally, you’re a completely different person. You’re not the same person anymore at all. So you have to get out of that mindset of that old person. And so I’ve told that to multiple women. I think that you’re stuck and being something that you’re not anymore. We have to continue to grow. So with me seeing that that’s the problem with most of the women, trying to stay in a position that God is trying to move them out of is making it hard for them to actually be or do or have the things that they want. So what I usually tell most of them to do is to learn to get to know this person that you are now. Do things now that will help you get to know who you are, if that’s reading or journaling, or try new things, things you haven’t done before. Because obviously whatever you was doing, it’s over with. It’s time for you to move on. It’s time for you to grow.
Just being able to embark on this new journey of self, this new journey of love, this new journey of healing within themselves, because literally when a woman gives birth, that old woman you was, that person, she’s dead. She’s gone. You are a whole new woman now. So you got to embrace that. We try to take steps into embracing who you are now, what you can and what you can’t do, what you will accept and what you won’t accept.
JT: How does the work you do help with the number one mission of the Nation of Islam, which is to resurrect the spiritually and mentally dead?
Angelica: This is what Mother Tynnetta said, and this is what confirms to me that I am in my purpose. I am walking in that divine purpose. So Mother Tynnetta said: “[The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad] saw our women organizing conventions of classes for women’s training and organizing committees of further training that would take us on travels around the world being honored and received in many places of the globe as the equal to the best in world society. He envisioned that if we followed his guidance and instruction, that others would be so attracted to us by our discipline, manners, refinement and dress codes of decency that they would eagerly seek to know more about us, our origin and what part we would play in the future development of world politics and society. I bear witness, along with my two traveling companions and vanguards, on this journey to Mongolia that his words are truly coming to pass and his word is bond.”
So when I think about what I want to do, I had in my mind that this Healing with Angelica, I want to take this to another level and also be able to most importantly, of course, incorporate the Teachings and all of this especially from the Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad and being able to show women their worth, their value, how to be women. Because we’ve been taught what to do as women, but we really don’t know how to be women or how to really be in our ‘femininity,’ and that’s what he taught us. That’s what he taught me.
If I’m able to help our women tap into their divinity, their femininity within themselves, they’re able to actually grow into that god that Allah has already ordained them to be, that glory, that beautifulness that they already have within themselves
JT: How have you seen the impact of your work in the people you have been helping and coaching?
Angelica: All I can say is all praises are due to Allah. I can tell with the things that [my clients] talk about now, the things that they’re into now, especially with their diet and just the way that they see things in regard to just having a different perspective. So I will have women come to me and say thank you just for even being open to speak with me and also be open to share your story, because when I talk to the women, I also have to share a part of me, too, because I want them to understand that I get what you’re going through. I get what you’re talking about, trust me. So let’s see what we can do together. I always say that I’m not your healer. I’m just here to assist you in your healing journey, because you already have the healing power within you. So when I see that even after speaking with the women and seeing them actually putting what I’m telling them to do into application, it’s so beautiful because you can see just in their spirit, how they talk and how they speak now. Oh my gosh, I love it. I am just so grateful to Allah that He gave me the gift to be able to assist women in that way.
JT: Do you have any upcoming projects?
Angelica: I don’t have anything in particular in this time. I’ve been, honestly, talking to Allah like, “Am I really on my journey? Is this what I’m supposed to be doing?”
I had in my mind that I really want to start a nonprofit, be able to talk to the youth. I’m still young, now, but the teenagers. I really want to do that. I have a lot of things that I want to do in regards to women. The message that I read about what Mother Tynnetta said about the Honorable Elijah Muhammad and what she sees us doing, I see me doing that with women. Having healing retreats, doing things of healing. And it’s not just physical. I really work on the mental. Whatever is going on in your mental, the physical follows. Right now, I don’t have anything in particular, but I’m still steadfast in my goal of being able to have a nonprofit and be able to speak to women all around the world.
JT: Is there anything else you want to add or share with us?
Angelica: I truly, truly love the Teachings, I love Islam, and I truly love the Minister. The Minister really came into my life at a time that was really really needed. And I just wanted to thank the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan for saving my life.